The Pro Wrestling/Sports Entertainment Thread

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Hammer

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is the sound sync off for anyone else on takeover from last night? i got through street profits/undisputed era and couldnt take it anymore. no other video on the network does that to me though, so im wondering if they just fucked up and will get it fixed during the week, or... something. the reviews on cole/gargano are so wide ranging. it seems its either "the greatest match in nxt history" or "why does gargano kick out of EVERYTHING just to lose anyway, stupid match" with no middle ground. so im kinda intrigued.
 

Hammer

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little disappointed in the selective selling of the ankle from ibushi. but i thought jay white actually wrestled a pretty damn logical match, and ibushi winning was clearly the right call. even for a japanese crowd, they were absolutely crazy for the closing sequence. 3.5 seems about right to me. ibushi going through spurts where he would run absolutely fine on the ankle, kinda killed some of it for me. but they definitely made him look like a legit ace here.
 

Wit-mmer

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little disappointed in the selective selling of the ankle from ibushi. but i thought jay white actually wrestled a pretty damn logical match, and ibushi winning was clearly the right call. even for a japanese crowd, they were absolutely crazy for the closing sequence. 3.5 seems about right to me. ibushi going through spurts where he would run absolutely fine on the ankle, kinda killed some of it for me. but they definitely made him look like a legit ace here.
I know you are disappointed but I thought when I enable enough evil to beat the fuck out of his ankle and allow that sick ass Inverted Dragon Screw I thought you would be pleased.

No one respects evil these days.
 

Hammer

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night of champions 2011

opening promo tells us we're getting orton/big mark, del rio/cena, and the main event of the show is a non-title match between hunter/punk. if hunter loses hes fired as the coo. one guess who wins that one. hottest act in the company? get your shovel hunter!

cole, booker and lawler calling the action.

tag team title match kicking off the show. i didnt even know these titles still existed. and the miz opens us up, so thats a small victory. and truth follows him out. miz and truth are rapping themselves to the ring, they tell everyone theyre fat and that they suck. truth called himself the suntanned superman! old school tna promo shoutout.

evan bourne is one of the opponents with that terrible looking tag title. who wants to bet kofi is his partner? ahah... of course he is. "we got nothing for this/these titles right now, what do we do? meh... give it to kofi for a couple months."

"me being a part of a great tag team... booker t and goldust" yea lets just ignore that him and his brother won the wcw tag straps like 92 times vince. and as booker is rambling about this, kofi, bourne and truth botch was supposed to be an assisted headscissors, i think.

an eric moulds jersey. wow. taking it back.

these commentators are terrible.

so now kofi and bourne... playing the heels? reverse booking at its finest. and when i say finest i mean... it makes zero sense, to have your white bread babyfaces do the blind tag/slap spot.

so now the ref doesnt hear the legit tag for truth and miz, and hes throwing truth out. playing up the conspriacy victims storyline, understood.

and miz wins the match with the skull crushing finale, except this ref is the most incompetent ref in the history of the sport. if an umpire was this bad in a real sport, hed have been fired immediately.

miz attacks the ref, and hes totally justified. they get dq'd. they should destroy this guy. only a shove and a slap post match. theyre ranting and raving in the ring. and then something got cut out in between, and we get a miz/truth backstage interview. basically just to push that hunter might be fired later. lets move on. that was a basic tag match to get these 4 guys on the card, and to get miz/truth closer to their job out date to rocky and cena.

ic title up next. no idea who could be involved here. cody is still doing the grotesque gimmick. and hes the champ. holy shit hes facing ted dibiase. this could be a negative star classic. definitely two of the worst themes ever. dibiase looking very generic here. i think this is a good spot to go to sleep.

a minute into the match and cody goes for his patented headlock. but ted slips out and locks on a rousing headlock of his own! yowie wowie folks!

this is less pathetic than i expected it to be, honestly.

that was... there. it wasnt negative stars by any means, but it wasnt overly good. and the ending would seem to indicate that this isnt over. wonderful.

christian up next! oh hes in street clothes. im guessing hes doing commentary for ortons induction into the hall of pain.

hes out here asking for "one more match" again. he wants to face orton or big mark right after their title match. that sounds like a bad idea. and then he goes into cheap bills related heat. meh.

lobsterhead interrupts. hes in street clothes too. why is this segment on a ppv? "whats the craic" marvelous.

alright this promo just collapsed into ridiculous. get mark henry out there stat. sheamus ends this with a brogue kick, and we can move on.

something else is cut out. fatal 4 way for the us title up next. a john morrison sighting. i honestly have no idea whos the us champ, and who else could be in this match with kofi, miz and truth in the opener. ok alex riley out second, hes still around for now. hey hey jack swagger is still a thing! gotta be dolph as the 4th, right? and yep, thats tipped, by them mentioning vickie trying to get jack in her stable. dolph is the champ and out with vickie. a new version of dolphs theme. i actually dont mind this match, even though theyve basically either never given me a reason to care, or have made me stop caring about everyone in this match. could be fun though.

we're all over the place here. this is completely built around dolph/jack/vickie though, as riley hits his tko, vickie puts swaggers foot on the ropes, and dolph, evidently not understanding how fatal 4 ways work, asks vickie "did you just cost me my match?" no you dullard, she kept the match alive.

im still really surprised the wwe machine didnt get behind morrison more.

riley hits his jumping ddt, and swagger kicks out. nice false, not knowing anything about this match, and whether riley ever actually held the us title, i went "wow, they gave riley the strap huh?"

swagger hits the doctor bomb on morrison, and as he goes for the pin, ziggler shoves him out of the way and steals the win. i actually didnt mind any of that. perfectly solid match, it told its main story fine, and they actually kept riley relatively strong.

ooh a big mark interview. short and sweet. he doesnt need to speak much.

and now vickie backstage. this is another triple h is getting fired promo. cole tells us another ppv in 2 weeks. 2 fuckin weeks! christ.

big mark/orton up next! lets do it! somebody gon get they ass kicked. somebody gon get they wig split. big pop for orton.

mark bending orton around the post is a very nice visual.

i enjoy everything about this match. everything about it is logical and realistic.

well played all around. mark looks like a legit killer, orton wasnt totally squashed and it keeps it open for orton to get a redemption shot since he wasnt out of his element. and the looming stench of an inevitable rko and orton win was kept in the air after orton kicked out of the first worlds strongest slam. im sure i was absolutely stunned in real life when they pulled the trigger on big mark here. aside from mark not ever bothering to extensively sell the knee that orton worked on early, i have no issues. love it. that mightve been my first legit mark out moment in this timeline.

great post-match promo out of big mark as well. i kinda wanna raise this a quarter star just for that.

punk backstage promo with johnny ace. nothing of relevance.

divas title match up next. this looks like a good time to go back to work.

and we're back a bunch of hours later, because i wanna finish up this event. kelly kelly out first, with eve. shes the champ. and they tell me the challenger is beth phoenix again. big pop for beth, maybe the second biggest of the night so far behind randall keith. nattie neidhart out with her.

kellys athletics really arent that terrible. but man she moves in slow motion to get in the correct positions to do these hurricanranas and headscissors etc.

kelly pins her with a rollup out the back of a glam slam, we'll just ignore the fact that her feet werent even over beths shoulders. that wasnt an abomination, kelly just isnt as good as they hoped she would be. beth, and a surprisingly hot crowd for a divas match, did their best.

cena/del rio up next for the "most important title in sports entertainment history!" dont tell that to mark henry.

no car for berto berto tonight. hes asking ricardo where his keys are. obviously cena yoked em. so cena stole del rios car, and cole is the only one using any logic. we've moved on from del rio being a rich guy from mexico, to basic evil foreigner #33. meh.

cena gives himself his own introduction, and its pretty cringey.

crowd is pretty hot for this one in the early goings. we're doing the slow build, as we seem to have been doing for the last couple months of cena matches.

del rios enziguiris are fantastic. and i kinda like working the kidney/lower back, but hes been kinda spotty in working it. and cena is very spotty in selling it.

del rio, i guess since its early on in his run, is still pretty smooth in the ring. cena is as clunky as ever.

i legit had no memory that cena won the belt back here. the booking over the last couple months just proves to me that they never actually planned any of punk getting over, and they just ran with it temporarily and then decided "fuck it, lets bury him back down the card." the match itself was pretty meh. i was actually fine with del rio, but it basically turned into another adventure of super cena.

punker/hunter up next. this was supposed to be punk/nash, and something happened to nash right? i wanna say he got mrsa, right? "skinny, fat ass." awesome. and nash comes back and hhh fires him. this build up still makes absolutely no sense. this is dumb. nothing about that video sheds any light on why punk should have animosity towards hhh, after it was revealed nash just did everything on his own. meh.

oh no dq match. you know theres gonna be sledgehammers and kendo sticks and kevin nashes involved in this one.

"we want colt cabana and the kings of wrestling" sign in the crowd. and you ended up getting all 3 of them. and they ended up doing nothing with any of them! when cesaro is easily the most successful of a 3 man group, you know a whole lot of waste was going on there.

punk attacks hhh during his spitting water schtick. nice.

im fine with this match right now. if this is meant to be personal, with all the shit punk talked about hunter, steph and vince... this is more logical than them trading wristlocks and drop toe holds for 20 minutes.

something obviously happened to cole when he lost his voice last match, because this match is all king and booker. or his mic is dead, since i just saw him still sitting at ringside right as i was typing that.

the worst elbow drop in the history of the sport through the announce table.

and here comes miz and truth. the positives of never seeing these ppvs in full, i honestly dont know why the hell they do the things they do.

skull crushing finale on triple h, lie detector on punk... and they put punk on top. but red shoes armstrong still takes about 40 minutes to count to 3, so hunter kicks out. so truth and miz kick the hell out of armstrong. and theyre doing it for all of us, so thank you guys.

holy overbooking, here comes johnny ace for some reason. and punk and hunter dispose of truth and miz, punk throws truth over the top rope, and he lands right on scott armstrong, which is hilarious to me for no reason at all.

pedigree on punk. johnny ace stops a ref from running in and tells him to fix red shoes. this is all pretty dumb. now a gts to hunter, and johnny sends the ref in the ring. but truth pulls punk out. good lord we're gonna exhaust every non-finish in the book for this one, huh?

another pedigree. and punk kicks out clean! ol hunter giving punk some rub! and johnny ace is texting someone. here comes kevin nash im sure. yep, nash through the crowd.

great powerbomb on punk. trips drills nash with a sledgehammer. we're checking all the boxes in this one. and one more pedigree, and hunter gets his much needed win.

ok im gonna be honest, i didnt really hate all of that. it was... way overbooked. im assuming we're getting punk and hunter teaming up on raw or the next ppv vs miz/truth/nash in some combination of nonsense. it wasnt the greatest worked match of all time or anything like, and it was totally hectic and all over the place, but it was far from boring. 2.5 seems right to me. i enjoyed that match, i loved everything about mark/orton, and the us title 4 way was filler but fun. coulda did without everything else.

3.5 stars: mark/orton
3 stars: us title 4 way
2.5 stars: hhh/punk
2.25 stars: cena/del rio
2 stars: cody/dibiase, kelly/beth
1.75 stars: kofi/bourne vs miz/truth
 
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Hammer

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hell in a cell 2011

based on the opening video im guessing triple threat between cena/punk/del rio and big mark/randall keith rematch in the cell. and that is actually confirmed later in the video. great. hall of pain mark is the greatest gimmick ever, suck it.

cole tells us 4 titles are up for grabs tonight. we already know two of them, ill guess the tag titles to get bourne/kofi on the card, and the divas, as the other 2.

wow jr calling the action. with booker and cole. and christians theme! wooooo. i assume hes putting over sheamus after last month, but thats fine. and cole confirms this... man that "great white" nickname was pitiful.

miz and truth in the crowd. johnny ace coming out with security. im fairly certain i remember where this leads. they are unfairly kicking out them out. what bullshit. these guys really got fucked over every month since like june, and they were totally correct in their protests. they shouldve put them over rock/cena.

lobsterheads awesome theme hits, and we're moving on. at this point in their careers i like both these guys, so this could be pretty solid.

booker t is the most distracting commentator in the history of wrestling.

very solid match. the only thing i really hated about it was booker t speaking. for whatever reason i like face sheamus. and christian is always a stud.

striker interview with big mark. its clear mark isnt overly strong at cutting promos, but they kept it short and sweet again, and im fine with it.

sin cara is coming out. we havent seen him since mitb. "who deserves to be called the real sin cara?!" ugh we're here already? sin cara blue vs sin cara black. wunderbar. this was before hunico got the tattoo on his shoulder. im pretty sure no one, anywhere, gives a fuck about this.

and theyre still doing the bullshit light.

this is every bit as acrobatic and awkward as a regular aaa lucha libre match. i mean that in the absolute positive and negative way.

what was the reason for that moonsault? i dont outright despise lucha libre... but that was pretty fuckin dumb.

this is terrible. mistico was horrendous for wwe. i have no issues that they re-pushed him after that great mitb performance... but i definitely see why they gave up on him after this one.

it took them 10 minutes into this match to change from "sin cara 1 and 2" to "sin cara blue and black". dear god.

"sin cara blanco" "i dont know what blue is, thats white". cole said both of these statements back to back. please get me out of this match. immediately. its azul by the way, i barely ever went to high school and im a total alcoholic and even i know basic spanish. lets move on.

and 2 minutes later cole figures out its azul. everything about this is terrible. if they have the greatest ending in wrestling history, i dont think im going above 1.5.

im legit at the point i wanna see kelly kelly vs one of the bellas. get these two guys out of the ring.

"thrust kick to the mask area" i love you booker

and mistico gets the win. i dont even care to describe it. that was one of the worst matches ive ever seen from two legit trained wrestlers. i wish somebody was filming vince watching this at gorilla. that was probably infinitely more entertaining.

punk and otunga backstage. i vaguely remember this. it ends up leading to a fairly entertaining segment on raw where everybody else in the company walks out, and cena faces sheamus, with triple h as the ref, and cm punk on commentary. i might bonus that after this, if i can figure out which raw it was. "ill do commentary as long as i can wear your coat"... or something to that effect. (october 11th 2011, that was pretty easy actually)

kofi and bourne up next. to absolute dead silence.

"yes, air boom is your fault. ... this might be the worst nickname since harlem heat." i still like random heel michael cole

EXCUSE ME! ziggler and swagger? yep vickie eventually confirms. and ziggler is still the us champ.

this match is as bland as every participant. except jack.

dolph and jack actually work pretty well as a tag team. this match is still as basic as it comes though.

bourne and kofi return. meh. there was nothing about this match. nothing overly bad, but nothing good either. basic move the storyline along match.

hell in a cell coming down. im assuming this is big mark. cole confirms. i feel like this is the same hype video from last month, but i dont care.

whoa, hey, whoa, hey, somebody gon get they ass kicked. somebody gon get they wig split. he shoulda been the champ forever.

nice pop for randall. i think ill go to sleep for work here, since i wanna watch everything about this match. randys been very good lately with christian and then big mark, and mark is... the best.

cole tells me another ppv in 3 weeks. so in a 6 week span, theyve had 3 ppvs. yikes.

dear christ. most guys struggle to get those steps in the ring. mark henry showed more velocity throwing those stairs than daniel jones does throwing a football.

"i run this!" yes you do sir mark

mark with very good back work the entire match, but much like almost everything else in this era, im not sure it really needed the hiac stip.

big mark kicks out of an rko. woooo. i honestly dont recall many clean kickouts of the rko, if there ever was one.

orton goes for the punt, big mark catches him in the worlds strongest slam, and fuck yo couch randall, its over. whoa hey whoa hey. hall of pain continues. that was solid but nothing special.

mark tries to give orton a much needed vacation, for all the good work hes done with christian and mark the last 5 months or so, and that sore loser orton hits mark with a chair a bunch of times. what a shithead.

alberto interview in the back with matthews. "im not an animal..." "...but when an animal gets trapped, thats when he gets more vicious." so... you are, or you arent?

cody rhodes coming out in a suit. another good spot to take a break.

cody rhodes pausing because the crowd is chanting in his promo like guys who actually get reactions to their promos, is hilarious. since no one in the crowd is reacting. at all.

oh this promo does have some relevance, he introduced the new/old ic title here. and cody calls it the classic ic belt. very good.

"i will defend it any time, any place..." why do i get the feeling this is gonna turn into an ic title match. yep, right on cue johnny ace interrupts. johnny stooges on triple h, and says that hunter is making cody defend the ic belt against.... john morrison. well, at least he got a better reaction than cody.

i will admit, cole ranting and raving over codys outfit, and jrs sarcastic quips, are pretty entertaining. especially factoring in booker trying to keep up with his madness.

aside from that pace killing mid match rest hold, that wasnt terrible. in the ring at least. the commentary got a couple chuckles early, but man, cole was way too much here.

hunters on the phone. johnny comes in. hunter tells him to stop making matches. johnny says truth/miz are on the attack. and rightfully they should be. unfortunately, all they did was beat up kofi and bourne.

beth and nattie coming out. its for the divas title. im assuming its beth because its her music. kelly is still the champ for ungodly reason. christ.

beth kneads her elbow in kellys lower back, and then smacks her ass. i got a korean girl on main street that does that for me once in a while.

"shucky ducky quack quack" "what? what does that mean?" good for you jr

this is pretty rough.

they even botched that pinfall. the ref counted 3, beth kinda rolled the shoulder up, and nattie got on the apron immediately afterwards, leading me to believe nattie forgot her cue.

why does nattie have a microphone. ugh. this is dumb. beth wins with a glam slam. hooray for everyone that thats over. still better than sin cara vs sin cara though.

cell is coming down. and we get a recap video of the wwe title the last couple months. "when that cell is locked, the controversy is over!" oh john, have you not been watching wwf/e for the last million years?

this punk guy appears to be over.

del rio is carrying everything about this match right now. storytelling, in-ring work. the other two are along for the ride.

hmm. so that steps into the cage spot with punk was actually more damaging than it looked. very good.

this is actually pretty good, honestly. as much as i was prepared to hate it.

that wasnt a side suplex, jr.

hey kevin dunns production finally worked, on cenas leg drop.

so im gonna be honest right now. i re-read a lot of our early entires, and i saw i was really high on edge. i really like del rios work right now. punk stinks. hes the guy that only watching ppvs hurts, since i dont see his promos, which is where he probably won me over in real time. hes not a good wrestler. at least in terms of execution. he does understand the little things.

so del rio just put punk on top of cena, for well more than a 3 count. but chioda isnt counting. okie dokie.

the worst top rope elbow in history. cm punk folks.

ricardo jumps the ref, steals the key, cena thwarts him, but cena ends up getting locked out. i kinda like it.

del rio is really damn smooth in the ring at this point.

and logically... del rio blasts punk in the face with a pipe, and wins the belt. cena in instantly, and here comes miz and truth. the cell got re-lowered so helmsley and johnny ace cant get back in. im sure that ends up getting blamed on big johnny. im fine with all of this. the match was... solid enough. i feel like del rio did all the heavy lifting there. honestly i misremembered, i thought miz and truth were the reason del rio won.

and now they made the entire locker room look like dullards. ugh. truth and miz attacking refs and camera men do kinda do well at putting them over. and helmsley takes them both out while theyre handcuffed, and the entire roster just looks on. of course. lets end this show. you had a good thing going.

3.25 stars: sheamus/christian
3 stars: del rio/punk/cena
2.5 stars: mark/orton
2.25 stars: cody/morrison
1.75 stars: kofi/bourne vs jack/dolph
1 star: beth/kelly
dud: sin cara/sin cara
 
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Hammer

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great reviews coming in on walter/bate from earlier, to no shock of anyone im sure. ill give it a watch tomorrow morning.
 

Hammer

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aew was very good tonight. pac/omega was superb, lucha bros vs the bucks and janela/havoc/allin were both really fun chaos matches... and lax was a nice surprise. cody/spears was merely solid but the story was very good, and i enjoyed jericho/hangman. im good with the result too. im guessing with jericho as champ, and him losing clean to pac, they're gonna do a redemption arc that eventually leads to the strap for omega.
 

Hammer

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finally got around to nxt uk... cesaro/dragunov was a gem. every bit as good as omega/pac.

oh... but neither of them held a candle to walter/bate. legit match of the year candidate, id have to give a rewatch, but this is in the 5 star conversation. very much up your alley witty.
 

Formerly Known

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42 minutes is right up my alley? I'm worried.
 

Formerly Known

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I know it's revisionist history, but...they're leaning into the 'Stupid' thing in this Orton/Kofi feud as if ORTON was the guy that did something wrong. Kofi was clearly the one in the wrong there, but they're presenting it like it was Orton holding him down.

I...can't unsee the fuck up after watching it relatively recently.
 

Hammer

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"Wiki says he went to All Japan and won their tag titles, so I guess so. He wasn't interesting or good from anything I saw between NJPW and WWE, so he's easily forgettable. " (this is about yoshitatsu)

i was reading back some of our old reviews because im trying to kill some time before darts tonight. anyway, i came across this... theres a running blog i try to keep up with, a guy basically does a running review of every episode of wwecw (and he reviews whatever ppv matches there are as he comes across them). basically what we do with these ppvs. anyway, in one of his recent ones, he basically makes mention that wwe was pushing very hard to get tanahashi during that time period, and when tanahashi re-signed with njpw... they basically took tatsu as the backup plan. man, how that wouldve changed the fuck out of things all over the place. it really had me curious as to whether this was true, or if he was just embellishing the situation. was tanahashi ever really that close to coming to wwe in 09/10? he was already basically new japans ace, but he obviously wasnt as revered and loved as he would come to be.
 

Hammer

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vengeance 2011. christ theres another ppv before survivor series.

so based on the opening video, in between is where the whole show walked out on hunter, and we were left with cena vs sheamus, with helmsley as the ref and punk as the commentary. basically putting those guys over as our top faces. and big show is back to face big mark. and im assuming del rio/cena in something. confirmed as a last man standing. and punk/hhh vs truth/miz. knowing where truth/miz go, logic would dictate they should win. but hunter is in the match, so...

cole, booker and king, cole tells me 5 titles are on the line. and we're kicking off with the tag straps, as vickie is still doing the excuse me schtick. xpac heat, i dont care what anyone says. dolph and jack are a team. dolph is the us champ. i dont know how much interest im gonna have for this match if theyre facing kofi/bourne.

and cole tells me dolph is defending against zack ryder right after this match. are we here already? we got a mixed theme for kofi/bourne, who are billed as air boom. i feel like i went over this last ppv, but its been a couple weeks, so i forgot.

holy piss. awesome monkey flip from ziggler.

hey hey, the ref calling out the illegal man. an intricacy! we dont get many of them anymore. sadly it wasnt from a wrestler. 4 stars for the ref!

and we're just slowing this down with rest holds all over the place.

with the amount of time theyre giving these guys, id tend to think they thought highly of these 4.

that was acceptable. not great, but not terrible.

woo woo woo. ryder out to dead silence. i gotta be honest, i was one of the guys who liked his internet show and got him over. and i give him a ton of credit for getting over without the wwe machine. but yea, i do remember him as a pretty terrible wrestler.

man ryder is bad.

after a whole bunch of mediocrity, dolph hits a nice superkick to win. i dont know why he didnt keep that as his finish, instead of the zig zag.

punk and ted dibiase talking backstage. why. and now punk and hunter talking. halfway through i feel like theyre improvising... i like it. it got its point across.

beth phoenix out as the divas champ. we get a backstage segment skit. no one cares. eve is getting a title shot here. eve's theme music is about as generic pop music as we can get. again... no one cares. im pretty sure the reaction was even more silent for eve than it was for zack ryder.

not a bad start here actually. eve showing solid athletics.

meh, we've slowed this down now, but beth working on eve's ribs to at least make the action mean something. but then beth keeps telling her to cry, which is absolutely pathetic.

"an upside down abdominal stretch and a figure 4 leg lock!" or a reverse triangle choke with the armbar. close enough jerry.

the guy with the eve sign in like the 8th row wouldve got punched in the throat about 10 minutes ago if i was sitting behind him.

and beth retains with a glam slam. that wasnt pathetic at all. eve needs work, but the athletics and the jiu jitsu background suggests that she couldve eventually became something decent if she stayed with it.

striker and big show backstage. i expected nothing from this, but he actually did a pretty good job with that.

christian theme song! and hes in wrestling gear! "for weeks hes pushed the buttons of sheamus" i guess we're getting a rematch from last month.

"at least jr doesnt have to stumble through his words when he tweets" wow that seemed uncalled for. and totally out of vince's mouth.

christian is a total gem of a wrestler

awesome reversal of the brogue by christian.

christian really needs to stop going for the spear and that middle rope backwards dive. nothing good has come from it these last 6 months or so. poor christian. that was a perfectly fine match. as i said last month, christian is great and this is around the time i really started to warm to sheamus' big boy brawling strategy.

otunga and big johnny backstage. johnny says he invented the name vengeance. hes great. here comes miz/truth. "nah... not really. but i do like the way you guys suck up." that was fairly entertaining. and then when johnny ace walked away, it really fell apart when miz and truth tried to run down hunter and punk. terrible. truth smiling through this entire promo... hes really just not convincing as a heel here.

hunter and punk vs truth and miz up next. im stunned hunter didnt give himself the main event again. we get a recap video that basically starts at money in the bank. cody, ziggler, nash, christian, truth, miz and punk all bitch about how bad hunter is. johnny ace is even worse though, so punk and hunter come to a mutual agreement. or something.

truth/miz' remix version might be worse than the original version. any legitimacy they mightve had from running a muck the last couple months is completely ruined by this hokey shit.

what are the chances that the logical thing happens here, and hunter takes the fall? like 0 percent, right?

i hate that truth is supposed to be a serious heel complaining of injustice... and he still does all the same acrobatic splits and dances and shit that he did as a face. terrible.

hunter and punk doing the help figure 4 spot like the heels that theyre portraying. oh... wait...

it doesnt help the credibility of the figure 4 that miz has been in it, with "assists" from punk, for about 10 minutes now. and scott armstrong is blind as he turns around and totally ignores punk.

and miz completely no sells any type of leg injury. sigh.

punk making the huge hot tag that they built up for... 2 minutes, or so.

and now we're building up heat for the hot tag, on the always sympathetic triple h. this match is backwards in every booking sense ever created.

you know youre involved with something special, when BOOKER T is the logical commentator at the table.

we're up to like 4 rest holds in this match too. which i actually wouldnt mind so much, if punk was the guy on the receiving end.

for some reason the crowd is actually ready to explode when hunter makes the tag. just imagine the frenzy theyd be in if the guy they actually liked was being used for it.

hunter really milking this. its kinda comical in fact.

punk doesnt look too happy with truth at the moment. it looked like he muttered something under his breath twice about him. he shoulda yelled "stupid" so we couldve killed 2 black man pushes with that.

the worst top rope elbow ever. "elbow to the heart!" except he was probably closer to missing than he was the heart.

oh goody, and kevin nash is back again for some goddamn reason.

skull crushing finale and lie detector combined finish off punk. cole tells me the name of the finisher is called "lil jimmy's finale." im chuckling far more than i should, thats surprisingly good. and nash continues to go after hunter. who cares. and nash almost botched that powerbomb on hunter. luckily hunter spun in mid air instead of taking that full on his neck.

that match was... meh. everything about it was backwards, the nash interference, punk taking the fall, meh. and the way they keep replaying the powerbomb, i wonder if that was planned for hunter to take it that way. i also dont really care that much though.

del rio and johnny ace backstage. i kinda zoned out on this.

randy orton. no idea where this is headed or against who, but based on the last couple months, i got a bad feeling about this. holy shit, and its confirmed, cole tells me its cody rhodes. i am... morbidly intrigued, i guess.

punch, kick, headlock! yep folks, we're in a randy orton match. and a cody rhodes match. a... both of these shitheads match.

i forgot stomps. but dont worry, cody picked that up for me.

one of the baggers get on the apron, and cody uses the distraction to hit cross rhodes. and you know, if it wasnt randy orton, i mightve actually bought that as the finish.

another bagger to distract, cody miscue right into an rko outta nowhere. if you didnt see that coming you havent been watching randy orton matches. thats probably better for you.

that ended up not so terrible. the entire middle portion of the match was basically just them getting their stuff in, but meh. unfortunately for cody, his stuff is basically just... cross rhodes, disaster kick and moonsault, at this point. im starting to think, even though i dont care for orton myself, that i 'like' him more than witty, so i tolerate his stuff more.

big mark and big show up next. it might be revisionist history, but i seem to remember them having some decent to good ones together.

great big mark recap video. they throw big show in there, they shouldve just closed the last hour of this show talking about mark henry. oh well.

WHOA HEY WHOA HEY what a perfect theme song.

this is very solid. for all the shit we can talk about big show, hes selling this damn leg better than 3/4ers of the roster.

alright he kinda gave up on it for his late flurry. he did throw some hints in there, but i felt like he couldve limped a little bit in his running a bit more. probably nitpicking on my part.

whoo mark clean kickout on a chokeslam. and big show matches with a clean kickout of the wss. great mark face of disappointment.

wow chokeslam off the top. i kinda feel like i wouldve been ok with that ending.

what the piss did i just watch? fuckin awesome. why dont i remember that at all? probably because ive never seen this before but... isnt cena/del rio still to come? the way it fell apart it was obviously gimmicked and planned but... i dont give a shit at all. awesome. i guess this is why they gave a last man standing stip to cena and del rio.

so i guess thats a non-ending. and im not upset we're getting this again next month. that was very solid. next month give them a no dq stip and let them go big boi. im probably gonna overrate this one but i dont care, big mark is great and that match was solid with one of the better non-endings youll see.

im guessing witlon is taking off another quarter star for the post-match selling of mark getting out of the ring. im good with it though. him walking away screaming "im the champion" is wonderful.

and now big johnny is talking for some reason. that promo was dumb and useless. and now we go from a storyline that was kind of logical, to more super cena.

ricardos in the ring with del rio. why am i getting the feeling theyre gonna run the early part of this match like they did last year with cena vs miz/riley?

meh, berto just used ricardo to take an early advantage. im fine with that.

as far as a wrestling match in a broken ring this isnt terrible but... this is supposed to be a last man standing match. belly to back suplexes are all well and good but... i guess i just assumed this would be an arena brawl because of the ring.

del rio is really a solid wrestler. that run back into the ring/aa spot was so damn smooth.

cenas arm falls 3 times, del rio uses a rear naked choke to win, he retains the title. oh my bad this is last man standing. and cena regains consciousness in about 4 seconds. very good.

nice spot by del rio into the barricade.

and now we head to the back.

del rio selling how heavy those 3 pound plastic sheets around the interview set were, was hilarious. kinda impressed actually. dont worry though, super cena is gonna bench press his way out from underneath im sure.

ahaha, cena pushing one of them clear off with one hand, as cole is trying to sell them as "huge steel plates!" is marvelous. oh big match john, you slay me.

right through a cardboard v! i do like that del rio hasnt just sat back and let chioda count uselessly to 5 or 6 for no reason much in this match, after the beginning flurry.

aa through the table off the steps. and miz and truth run out, and for some reason chioda stops counting del rio as a result. i was perfectly fine with this match til this. and now the ref is counting them both. what a dumb ending.

and cena gets up anyway. this is incredible. you know, if they had ended the match with the aa through the steps, i probably wouldve been bordering 3.25-3.5.

and a basic belt shot ends this match. del rio retains. they couldnt even let del rio do it 'himself', in a match where cena already had tons of built in excuses to look like a god. whatever. i did enjoy 3/4ers of that match. dumb ending is dumb. gotta keep john strong for rocky!

3.25 stars: big mark/big show
3 stars: sheamus/christian
2.5 stars: kofi/bourne vs jack/dolph
2.25 stars: del rio/cena
2 stars: orton/cody
1.75 stars: miz/truth vs punk/hunter
1.5 stars: dolph/ryder, beth/eve
 
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Formerly Known

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"Wiki says he went to All Japan and won their tag titles, so I guess so. He wasn't interesting or good from anything I saw between NJPW and WWE, so he's easily forgettable. " (this is about yoshitatsu)

i was reading back some of our old reviews because im trying to kill some time before darts tonight. anyway, i came across this... theres a running blog i try to keep up with, a guy basically does a running review of every episode of wwecw (and he reviews whatever ppv matches there are as he comes across them). basically what we do with these ppvs. anyway, in one of his recent ones, he basically makes mention that wwe was pushing very hard to get tanahashi during that time period, and when tanahashi re-signed with njpw... they basically took tatsu as the backup plan. man, how that wouldve changed the fuck out of things all over the place. it really had me curious as to whether this was true, or if he was just embellishing the situation. was tanahashi ever really that close to coming to wwe in 09/10? he was already basically new japans ace, but he obviously wasnt as revered and loved as he would come to be.
It's an interesting thought. I just don't know if WWE was ready to push a guy like that, at that time. Hell, Nakamura was(is) a better 'prospect' to a crossover audience with his natural charisma, and WWE refuses to even put him as a main eventer, so...

I'd assume Tanahashi probably would've peaked as Kaval with a little bit more staying power. How it would've hurt NJPW would be interesting, though, as losing their future ace would be something...
 

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oh absolutely, i was talking more about what it does to new japan, more than would tanahashi have become a mega star in america? i honestly dont think tana wouldve been booked any better than yoshi. i feel like vince wouldve gotten him on raw and smackdown, and not have even the slightest clue what to do with him.

new japan however... oof. so looking up the timeline... yoshi tatsu came over to america in late 07. by that point, i dont know that tana was the full out ace yet, but he already had a 9 month reign as the iwgp champ, and depending on the exact dates, he won it a second time in like october 07, so the rocket was on his back. its pretty safe to say though, if you cut tana out of new japan right there, they dont become the new japan they are today, and okada probably isnt the same okada we know today. okada really needed that "back from excursion" upset win over tana to really catapult him. i think the talent wouldve eventually made him a megastar in japan anyway, but i just dont know if the company itself means as much as it does right now. its the number 2 company in the world at the moment, i doubt its in that situation if tanahashi spent 2 years jobbed out in vinceworld.
 

Formerly Known

2016 & 2017 Mach Draft Contest Winner
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Survivor Series 2010

- The opening package focuses on John Cena, just like last month. Cena is free if Barrett wins the title tonight? Whatever. Can this fucking storyline end? This is also way too fucking long. WHO GIVES A SHIT ABOUT THIS?

Quick Ratings
US Title: ***1/2
Sheamus/JoMo: ***
IC Title: **1/2
SurSer: N/R
Divas: *
World Title: DUD
WWE Title: DUD

Full Thoughts
We're LIVE from Miami, Florida. The theme song is Runaway by Hail the Villain, which is actually a song that's still in rotation for me.

-WWE United States Championship: Daniel Bryan(c) vs. Ted Dibiase Jr. (w/Maryse)

So Dibiase attack Bryan on Raw the week prior to set up this match. Ehhh, simple and effective, I guess. And this is a nice lithmus test for Bryan on if he's a miracle worker or not. Cole is anti Bryan still, for continuity sake.

Donut King is the ref. Circle to start. Bryan chant, and he goes standard chain stuff to open. Bryan uses his quickness and gets a dropkick and an armdrag as the Miami folks forgot to pay their electric bill. Bryan raises a boot on a leapfrog attempt and Teddy bails. (I got distracted here watching the Reds be whiny little bitches about losing a baseball game and trying to fight.)

Dibiase shoulders Bryan on the apron and tea...oh shit, he just vertical suplexes Bryan to the floor. Fucking Daniel Bryan is nuts. Dibiase puts Bryan on the apron and drops elbows. He heads to the second rope on the outside...and drops an axehandle on Bryan. Huh. Back in, a cover gets two. Dibiase talks trash, but Bryan comes back with uppercuts and a kick. Dibiase blocks another kick, trips Bryan and punches away for two. Chinlock. Bryan elbows free, but Dibiase gets a backbreaker and a standing dropkick for two. Chinlock again. Bryan sledges free again, slips out of a suplex attempt and hits a dropkick to send Dibiase into the corner. Low kicks, high kicks by BBryan. Corner whip with a run up, and Bryan gets a clothesline, but he puts his head down and gets kicked. Bryan recovers quickly though and sends Dibiase to the outside and FOLLOWS IMMEDIATELY WITH A TOPE. Dibiase had to SCRAMBLE to his feet to get ready for that, because Bryan is awesome. Bryan's shoulder is fucked, though. And we wonder why he had issues later. Bryan sends Teddy back in and heads up. Owen Hart dropkick hits for two. Bryan grabs his shoulder still, but battles up and gets the yes kicks, but the last one is caught. Bryan gets the small package for two. LaBell lock try, but Teddy fights up, and gets a nice clothesline with the inside-out sell for two. Dibiase hypes himself up, and wants Dreamstreet, but Bryan blocks and goes Bret-Piper for two. Dibiase hangs on to the MDD on the kickout. Bryan flips out, but gets caught in a spinebuster for two. Dibiase punches away, and shoulders in the corner. Tedd puts Bryan on the top, but Bryan slips under and crotches Dibiase. Bryan hits a HUGE backsuplex from the top. Ted was up there. Bryan grabs his shoulder and it slows it cover to a two. Bryan uses the kickout to try to get the LaBell lock, but Jr. slip free. Dibiase gets a catapault into the corner and a roll up (TRYING TO STEAL ONE - Michael Cole) for two. Bryan uses the kickout to get the LaBell lock for the tap to retain.

Daniel Bryan is the best professional wrestler of all time. There. I said it. ***1/2.

Bryan poses on the ramp, but Miz comes from behind and hits Bryan with the briefcase and walks to the ring.

- Miz has a mic, and Alex Riley with him. The lights go out again, because Miami. Miz makes fun of the Heat and calls LeBron the 'Wade Barrett of the NBA'...ooooh. The fans chant for the Heat, because people realize they're good at this point. Miz says he's cashing in very soon because he's awesome. They continue to have lighting issues at the end of the promo, too.

- So were back, after interruptions delayed me by a few days.

- Backstage, Matthews is with Sheamus. Morrison called Sheamus a bully. Sheamus says JoMo is jealous because he's a former champion. He's not a bully, he VILL BREAK HIM.

- Sheamus vs. John Morrison

Sheamus does get some boos when he appears, after being silent. Is that Favre Jets jersey in the crowd? JoMo gets a high pitched pop, but it dies soon. I do need to add Stonefree Experience to my playlist, though. If I had to guess, I'd assuming Morrison goes over here to set him up as a strong challenger for Miz, but...yeah, we'll see.

Lockup to start, and Sheamus slaps. Morrison comes back fired up with forearms, but Sheamus just knocks him back down with one shot. Morrison gets a headscissors and a dropkick to send Sheamus to the outside and a corkscrew plancha follows. Morrison pounds away, but Sheamus shoves him into the barricade, and Irish Hammers him down on the floor. Back in, cover gets two. Sheamus knees away and steps on Johnny's head. Short clothesline gets two for Sheamus, and we hit the chinlock. Sheamus is...feuding with Santino, I guess? Whatever. Morrison fights up, but gets kneed in the gut and elbowed back down. Sheamus hits the taunt and gets a good heel reaction. Sheamus works the back with strikes, and hits a backbreaker for two. Back to the rest hold we go. The crowd gets behind JoMo, but a KITCHEN-SINKA takes Johnny down. Sheamus POUNDS away on the chest and covers for two. Lawler makes a Pirate joke, arr. Morrison tries to fight back but immediately gets forearmed back down. Sheamus puts John on the top and appears to be looking for a superplex, but gets punched down once. Sheamus recovers and POUNDS away on JoMo's back again. Where was this guy as champion? Morrison fights back with forearms and blocks the superplex. Crossbody by Morrison, but Sheamus rolls through and gets a powerslam for two. Sheamus wants the Brogue, but it misses and Morrison gets a step up enziguri to send Sheamus into the middle rope and cause the double count. Sheamus is still up first, but we get a strike battle. Morrison slips out of a bodyslam, and gets clotheslines and a leg lariat for two. Kick to the chest by Morrison, and another, but Sheamus blocks a clothesline gets the Irish Curse for two. Nice formula there. Sheamus now calls for the High Cross, but Johnny blocks and catapaults him into the turnbuckle. Russian leg sweep gets two for Morrison. John pounds away in the corner, but Sheamus sends him over the top of him onto the second rope and just calmly punches the leg to knock Johnny down. Sheamus immediately runs into an elbow into the corner, but boots away, and then flips Morrison over the top by the leg for two. Nice move there. Sheamus is getting frustrated, so he goes for the half crab. Morrison gets ropes. Morrison slips underneath Sheamus and rolls him up for two, but in one motion, Sheamus gets a chop block. Sheamus gets cocky with slaps, so Morrison hits the inside kick. Starship pain is blocked with a punch to the back to crotch JoMo. High cross is slipped out of, Brogue kick misses and JoMo hits the flying chuck. Running thigh strike gets the pin for Morrison.

This was not bad. Sheamus was really winding into form, and Morrison was great at selling here. Sue me, I really liked it. ***. (And the finish totally made sense to me.) Morrison is sure to sell the knee while walking to the back, even.

- Backstage, John Cena is wearing purple. Truth comes in. Truth offers to help Barrett win the title. Cena is a whiny bitch, and doesn't want his friend's help.

- WWE Intercontinetal Championship: Dolph Ziggler(c) vs. Kaval

No reaction for Low Ki, but he beat Dolph to earn the title shot. EXCUSE ME! Dolph gets a minimal reaction, as well. We'll see if Low Ki is motivated enough to pull a good match out of Dolph here and make us 3 for 3. Kaval is dedicating this match to the troops. Lawler makes Vickie jokes, because he's an idiot. Cole calls Kaval an 'internet darling.' Well, he's not wrong, but that's because he's FUCKING GOOD.

Standard lockup to start. And Kaval gets a nice chop in the corner. Shoulderblock takedown for one. Kaval strikes away, but Dolph gets control in the corner with a kick. Elbow, snapmare and the Hennig necksnap gets one for Dolph. Dolph elbows the collarbone, and gets a fireman's carry for one. Corner whip, but Kaval leapfrogs and rolls up Dolph for two. Dolph goes back to pound away with overhead elbows, but Kaval does a Springboard crossbody off a whip for two. Big chop in the corner by Kaval, and corner punches, but Vickie distracts and Ziggler slips underneath to send Low Ki into the top turnbuckle. Long cover gets two. Dolph goes VINTAGE gets the chinlock. Lazy, lazy chinlock too. Kaval fights up, but Ziggler gets a neckbreaker immediately for two. Dolph goes back to the rest hold. Kaval elbows free, and gets his boot up on the a corner charge. Axesmashes take Ziggler down, and Low Ki ducks a punch and goes low with kicks. Avalanche and a springboard moonsault. Not as smooth as it could be, but it gets two. HARD chop in the corner. They fuck up an Irish Whip, but Kaval gets a NICE JUMPING KICK TO THE FACE. Yikes. Kaval hits up, but Dolph is up quickly to crotch him. He grabs the sleeper on the second rope, but Low Ki elbows free. Kaval does some flip stuff, and it misses and he lands on his feet. Backslide gets two for Kaval, but Dolph pops up with a Fameasser for two. Ziggler gets the sleeper in the middle, but Kaval flips him over. Ziggler throws a charging Kaval over the top, but he lands on the top rope and hits a rebound engizuri for two. Both are down, but the fans don't seem to care. Kaval gets control first with a kick to the hammy, but Dolph gets a headbutt. They don't seem to nowhere where to go from here, though. Corner whip by Ziggler, but he misses a charge. Kaval goes for the rollup and it gets two again. Dolph gets a smallpackage for two in response. Kaval kicks low, but a whip is reversed. Kaval gets another rollup, but Dolph rolls through for the pin with the tights to retain.

This was...okay, if not a little sloppy. They had something with Low Ki, but his attitude was probably not the best for any locker room. He probably also needed some time in development, too, to get rid of the spotty tendencies, but...yeah. **1/2, though. There was some good stuff mixed in with the slop.

- Theme song. I mentioned it earlier. I liked the video for it, too.

- Backstage, Todd is with Jack Swagger. Swagger isn't happy that Del Rio is the captain, because AMERICA, YEAH! Swagger calls Miami 'Little Cuba'. Cody comes in and says Swagger is just mad because he couldn't get into a club. 'They were my grandfather's (shoes), and they're VINTAGE.' Oh, Jack is great. And here's Alberto to interrupt with Reks and McIntyre. Alberto says stuff, and when he speaks Spanish, Swagger's scoff is tremendous. Alberto says he's buying the drinks if the team wins tonight.

- Traditional Survivor Series Match: Team Mysterio (Big Show, Chris Masters, Kofi Kingston, MVP & Rey Mysterio) vs. Team Alberto (Cody Rhodes, Jack Swagger, Drew McIntyre,

Big Show is SMILING HAPPY BIG SHOW SLAP HANDS WITH THE CROWD YEAH! I love Masters' music. Kofi gets a decent reaction as does MVP in his hometown. They changed MVP's music because they're dumb. Rey even gets a decent pop. This crowd is good. Rey and Show won a battle royal on Smackdown, so ADR is getting it back tonight, I'm guessing.

Lawler calls Cody ugly again. No reaction to Swagger. No reaction to Drew. No reaction for Reks. No reaction for Ricardo. No reaction for ADR. Fuck off, Miami.

I pause here, because I expect this to be long.

And we're back!

Looks like the captains will start, as the crowd chants for MVP. Del Rio stalls a bit... and tags out to Cody. Cody goes to the arm, and Rey uses the ropes to flip over, so Cody kicks him in the gut. Striker cals Rickey Henderson the greatest baseball player of all time...which...I mean, it's not true, but it's not a TERRIBLE choice. Rey gets a headlock, but Cody knocks him down with a shoulder. Running sequence leads to Rey putting his head down, but Cody can't get the O'Connor roll, but can get a disaster kick for two. Tag to ADR, and a running kick to the gut takes down Rey. Alberto boots away. Rey gets a rana off a whip reversal, though, and a droptoe hold to the corner. Low corner dropkick hits. Snapmare, seated Senton and tag to MVP who gets a sliding clothesline for two. Montel pounds away in the corner. Del Rio reversed a whip, but can't get the step up enziguri. Running big boot in the corner gets two for MVP, as ADR gets hit foot on the rope. Tag to Kofi, and he springs in and lays a weak strike on Del Rio's arm. He snapmares ADR, covers for two and tags Masters. Hey, at least there's a good worker in there now that Kofi is out. Axehandle, but Del Rio goes to the eyes to take control immediately and tags Reks. Reks pounds away in the corner and tags Drew. Drew switches corners and pounds away on Masters. A couple short clotheslines finally take Masters down. Drew heads up to the second rope, but jumps into Masters' boot. Tag to MVP. Clotheslines! Suplex! Ballin elbow. Del Rio distracts as Drew rolls to the apron. MVP tries to suplex Drew back in, but ADR grabs the legs from the floor and Drew pins the hometown boy. 5-4 Heels.

Masters runs in and chops away on McIntyre. Corner whip try, but Drew reverses and...just kind walks over and tags out to Del Rio. The fans chant for MVP. Del Rio knees Chris low, but Masters overpowers him on a suplex attempt and gets a jackhammer for two. Masterlock try, but Del Rio slips free and does a backcracker on Masters' arm. Armbar causes a Masters tap. 5-3 Heels.

And here's Big Show to a big pop. Del Rio tags Swagger. Jack gets a go behind, but gets slapped in the chest. And again. Jack ducks under a strike, and goes low to Show's knee. Tag back to Del Rio. He slaps Big Show in the head. Del Rio wants to tag out, but Drew tells him to fuck off, so Del Rio tags him anyway. Del Rio gets cocky, so Show punches him in the face. Big Show brings in McIntyre the hard way and slaps his chest. Corner whip, but an avalanche is blocked with Drew boots. Future shock try, but Big Show blocks and clotheslines him down. Tag to Kofi, and Big Show slams him on Drew for two. The trainers help ADR to the back. Drew goes to the hair to take Kofi down, and tags Cody. Forearm by Cody, but Kofi slips out of a backdrop and slaps Rhodes in the face. Cody pouts about getting hit his beautiful face, and goes outside to check on his face. Cody walks in and gets slapped again, and Big Show is tagged back in. Big Show teases the WMD, but Cody covers up, so he's slapped in the back instead. Knock out punch and Rhodes is gone. 4-3 Heels.

Reks runs in with...something I missed, and have to rewind. And the new Network is shit, so it takes forever...and it still fucks up. Big Show is down now, and Reks tags Swagger. They double team for a moment. Then Swagger pounds away. And Reks is back in with boots. Drew gives a cheap shot from the apron. Back to Jack, who goes to work on the leg. The fans chant for Show as he reverses. Swagger punches, but gets caught in a goozle. He slips out and rolls through into the Ankle Lock. Snow is babyface, so he's not tapping, duh. Big Show crawls in and tags Rey. Springboards! A crossbody gets two. Rey leapfrogs in the corner, but Swagger catches him. He slips out, though, and runs into a nice big boot for two. Swagger is annoyed with Kofi and punches him down, so great babyface Kofi comes in and droptoeholds Swagger onto the ropes. 6-1-9 try by Rey, but Swagger catches him in the ankle lock. Rey spins free. Reks tags Swagger as he's on the ropes, but Rey dodges his strikes and tags Kofi. Springboard clothesline. Shitty chops. Dropkick! Kofi misses an avalanche, but gets his feet up for the rope kick on Reks. Pump crossbody gets two. Reks blocks a whip, but gets dropkicked down. Kofi tries the corner punches, but Reks moves and he crotches himself. Reks moves him to the tree of woe and boots away. Reks runs into...Kofi's feet from the tree of woe, I guess? And Kofi rolls him up to even it at three.

Drew walks in and gets hit with Trouble In Paradise, but he falls into his corner. Swagger tags himself in and grabs the ankle again, but Kofi fights up, and slides down the back on a slam attempt, and rolls Jackers up for two. Kofi blocks a clothesline, Jack blocks an SOS. Kofi slips out of a gutwrench bomb, and Swagger blocks trouble in Paradise by grabbing Kofi's ankle. Kofi taps to make it 3-2 heels.

Big Show runs in and takes down Swagger with clotheslines. Corner whip, Show follows with a hip attack, and knocks Swagger down with his body. Tag to Rey. Who...climbs on Big Show's shoulders, but Swagger is up...and then lays back down like he fucked up badly. Drew comes in and goes low on Show and Rey falls awkwardly...that was...weird. Rey grabs his right knee. Vader bomb gets two for Jack. He puts Rey on the top, and tries for a superplex, but Rey pounds him down. Rana into 6-1-9 position for Rey. 6-1-9 hits. Here's Show and they do the assisted splash from Show's shoulders for the pin on Swagger. 2-2.

Drew runs in and clotheslines Rey down. Drew wants the future shock, but Rey slips through and forces him into 6-1-9 position. Tag to Show, and he chokeslams McIntyre for the pin. And...the music plays, so I guess it's over and Del Rio isn't returning. Survivors: Rey and Show.

I'm not rating this one either, but this was even more disjointed than last months clusterfuck. It's like Rey put together a trios match in there where everyone knew counters to EVERY FUCKING MOVE and they forgot to have an impactful offense that wasn't a finish. Pretty pedestrian stuff.

- Backstage. Randy Orton is brooding. Matthews walks in with a mic. Randy is sick of talking about John Cena. You and me both, Randall. Randy is focussed on Barrett and retaining the title. He wants to stay champion.

- WWE Divas Championship, Handicapped Match: Layla and Michelle McCool(c) vs. Natalya

The champs get no reaction, of course. Nattie gets a small reaction and she's SMILING AND HAPPY! The champs must tag in and out here. Lil Naitch is the ref.

McCool starts with Neidhart, and trips Natalya down. And they roll around with McCool getting the advantage with strikes. Uppercut by McCool, but Natty gets a go bheind and takes her back down. McCool grabs the arm and gets a cover for one. Michelle punches away and tags Layla. Jumping clothesline gets two. Forearms by Layla. Spinning kick in the ropes leaves Nattie hanging towards the floor, but Layla doesn't have any interesting strikes to hit her with. McCool just cheapshots and pulls her down to the floor. Layla chases and kicks Nattie in the back and sends her in. Tag to McCool. Nattie blocks a double suplex and suplexes both heels, and then...bails, because...okay...? Michelle follows from heind and knocks her down on the floor. Boots to the back. McCool breaks the count, but misses a running boot and crotches herself on the barricade. Nattie throws her into the front row, and tries to pull her back over by the hair. Layla tries to cheapshot, but gets kicked in the gut. Natalya punches, and sends Layla over the barricade into McCool in the crowd. Natalya is selling her back a bit here, at least. She pulls McCool back over and pounds for a second, but McCool sends her into the barricade back first. Michelle breaks the count again and sends Natty back in. Michelle is immediately tripped down and she runs into the recovering Layla on the apron. Rollup for one, and Natalya gets the sharpshooter for the quick tap and the title.

Well...that was...not terrible, I guess. *. Don't know what they see in Natalya, but...it must be something. The heels attack Natalya from behind to get their heat back. Layla holds Natalya, as McCool looks at the belt...but...Beth Phoenix returns and runs down to take out McCool. Nattie fights free from Layla, and Beth knocks down the heels with ease. GlamSlam for Layla. Beth and Natalya hug, and Beth puts Natalya on her shoulders to celebrate the title win.

- I take another break, so I don't burn out.

- And we are back with the rest of heel team entering the ring for the SurSer match...nope I already did that match. Fuck this Network interface.

- World Heavyweight Championship: Kane(c) vs. Edge

No reaction for Kane on the intro, but he looks angry. So Edge abducted Paul Bearer to set this up, I guess. Dumb, but whatever. No boxing intros, because...okay? Good pop for Edge. SOOOOOUPERSTAR from Chimel. Edge goes back to get Kane's daddy, wait, nope, just an empty wheelchair. Striker says that Edge won a triple threat set this up.

Kane is fired up, but Edge ducks his strike and slaps. Edge dodges Kane strikes, runs and pulls Kane onto the top rope via the back of the neck. Edge runs back in and tries and axehandle, but gets caught in the goozle. Edge kicks free and punches. Weak heel kick for one. Kane takes over with a knee to the gut and slowly strikes away. Whip, but Edge slides out and plays the wheelchair, because comedy! Kane follows, but Edge runs in and comes back out with a baseball slide. Kane eats the barricade, and Edge strikes and sends him back in. Punches by Edge, and he ducks a big boot and Edge chop blocks. Knee work by Edge, and he punches away. You could hear a pin drop in this arena right now. Edge wraps the left knee around the ringpost, and comes back in and continues the attack. And we slow it down with a rest hold, but Kane quickly fights free. Uppercut by Kane, but Edge reverses an irish whip. Edguction DDT is blocked, though, and Kane hangs Edge up on the ropes ribs first. Running big boot knocks Edge to the floor. Kane follows, and DRIVES HOME THE STORYLINE. More strikes to the chest by Kane, and he heads back in. 'HARD(-ish)' Irish whip by Kane, and Edge bumbs off of it. Boots and chokes and strikes by Kane. Another weak Irish whip is oversold, as Kane is still asking about his daddy. Kane shoulders Edge into the corner and punches and kicks him down. Cover gets two. And...Kane goes to the neck crank. Jerry Lawler quotes Craig Pittman on commentary. A few fans try to get Edge going, and he punches free momentarily, but eats a basement dropkick for two. Back to the neck crank, this time standing. Edge punches free, and forearms. He runs into a backdrop, but lands on the apron and shoulders Kane in the gut. He rams Kane into the turnbuckle and follows with a crossbody for two. Edge punches, but Kane blocks a whip and gets a corner clothesline. Kane climbs and gets caught with a weak dropkick to counter the VINTAGE KANE CLOTHESLINE! Both are down, and the fans are still bored. Edge comes back, ducking a clothesline. Forearm! Clothesline! Droptoe hold into the ropes and a crossbody to the back of Kane on the ropes. Rollup gets two. Kane reverses a corner whip, but eats boot on a follow charge. Edge heads up, but gets caught with an uppercut to block an axehandle for two. Kane goes for a vertical suplex, but Edge slips out and the bottom drops out for two. Edge runs into a sideslam though, and Kane gets two himself. Back up goes Kane for the VINT...nope, Edge cuts him off again. Edge heads up, looking for...something, but Kane crotches him on the top rope and follows with the jumping clothesline for two. Kane calls for the chokeslam, but Edge grabs the ropes and gets the implant DDT for the double knockdown. Cole, 'Is this the momentum shift for Edge?' Uhhh...this match has been 50/50 all the way through, Michael. Edge wants a spear, but Kane gets the boot up to knock Edge down. Chokeslam hits for two. Kane is frustrated, because monsters are like that. Kane does the Taker pose to boos...Edge slips out of a tombstone, and gets a running spear for the pi...*sigh*...this is dumb. Double pin is call for by Mike Sparks. That was fucking putrid.

Let's move on. DUD. Kane attacks Edge after the match. Kane wants a chokeslam on the floor, but gets droptoeholded into the steps. And then sent face first into the post on the outside. Kane falls into the wheelchair, and Edge pushes him through the barricade into the timekeeper's area. Still. Don't. Care.

Also...since they keep calling it a tie...


You are welcome.

- Backstage, Wade and Cena are friendly. This is where the Nexus debuted. Huh. Cool. Wade cuts a good promo, John shows his acting chops by looking constipated. Cena says he'll do the right thing.

- WWE Tag Team Championship: Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater(c) (w/Otunga, McGuillicutty and Harris) vs. Santino and Vladimir Kozlov

Santino gets his standard pop. Heath and Santino start. Slater dodges a punch, but gets armdragged. Tag to Justin. Comedy shit by Santino, as he dodges Justin's offense and gets a headlock takeover. Vlad tags in and he throws Justin around and kicks him in the gut. Gabriel slips out of a slam and goes low, but takes a big bump off a battering ram to knock him to the apron. Gabriel hangmans him and comes back in with a quick neckbreaker. Tag to Slater. Jumping knee for two. Running knee and a boot and a tag to Justin. They boot away, back to Slater. More boots, back to Justin. Gabriel works the neckcrank, as well, and then switches to the headlock. Running boot the head gets two. Front face lock by Gabriel. The fans chant for Santino. Slater cheapshots Santino, and he gets distracts the ref for the heels to pull Vlad back. Tag to Slater, who...punches. And goes back to the front facelock. Slater breaks and punches, and sends Vlad into the corner. He tries to follow, but gets pushed back and battering rammed down. HOT TAG TO SANTINO! Lefts and rights. Split and a hiptoss. Jumping headbutt, but Gabriel breaks up the pin. Vlad uses his head to send he and Justin to the outside. Santino wants the cobra, but Nexus distracts, and Slater hits a jumping reverse clothesline...kinda a lazy Zig Zag, if you will, for two. Nexus beats up Santino after the match.

But...*sigh*...here's Hornswoggle with an email. It's just a reminder that Nexus is banned from ringside in the title match. I don't get the point of this at all, but whatever. Oh yeah, the match sucked, too.

- Free or Fired video package. Everyone is talking about it, says Striker. I don't care about this, so I'll take a quick shit and get water.

- WWE Championship, Free or Fired: Randy Orton(c) vs. Wade Barrett

HEY! Mark Sanchez jersey in the crowd! Cena gets a decent reaction as the ref, though...I think some people actually expected him to go full heel here, to be honest. Wade doesn't get much of a reaction. Big pop for Orton. (Again, no boxing intros here. Odd.) The fact that Orton is still over here is kinda odd, because this feud has all been about Cena.

So this should be the official end of the Barrett push, and I think it's about that time, sadly. I like Wade, but this hasn't worked because of the Cena shit. Cole again calls Nexus, 'One of the most powerful groups in history', DESPITE THEM BEING BOOKED LIKE JOKES THE ENTIRE WAY! FUCK OFF MICHAEL.

Staredown and they circle to start. Collar and elbow. Orton pushes Wade into the corner and clean breaks. Lawler calls the Nexus, 'The MOST DESPISED INDIVIDUALS HE'S EVER SEEN IN THE WWE.' This man worked in the FUCKING ATTITUDE ERA WHEN VINCE AND HHH WERE GETTING HEEL HEAT EVERY WEEK! FUCK THIS NARRATIVE!

Back to circling, and Orton runs over Wade out of a sideheadlock. Lockup, and Orton gets a headlock takeover. Wade uses his legs to get free, and Orton kicks out. Whip and a shoulder knockdown by Orton, and they stop and stare. Back to the sideheadlock, and Barrett pushes Orton in the corner and doesn't clean break. Punches and kicks, but, Orton comes back. Corner whip, by Barrett, but Orton explodes with a clothesline. Uppercut by Randall. Punches, elbow sand uppercuts in the corner, and Cena breaks it up. Barrett fires out with a big boot to take Randy down. Punches and boots. Wade chokes on the ropes. Turnbuckle shot and Wade punches and kicks. Cena forces Wade out the corner, too, and Orton uses the distraction to dropkick the challenger down. Orton punches away. Stomp the face by young Randall. And then a kneerdrop to the throat. Kick to the chest, and Wade bails. Orton follows, but walks into a kick. Orton is sent into the apron, stairs and baricade. Backfirst into the apron now, times two. Cena isn't counting, and Wade sends Randy into the steps shoulder first. Back in, a cover gets two. So...wait...the commentators are...confused and they've confused me. So is this no DQ/no countout? Seriously? It hasn't been said that at all all.

Wade shadow boxes and takes Orton down. He poses to boos. Cover gets two. Hard corner whip by Wade, and he chokes on the ropes again. Cover gets one. Now the announcers are lamenting that this is the FIRST BIG MATCH IN WADE'S CAREER! What about the fucking title match last month? Or that huge Nexus match at Summerslam that you said was the biggest in history? Or even the fucking Cena match you said was the biggest ever? Seriously...fuck this company right now. #SaveUsPhil. Wade grabs the chinlock. Stealing Randy's moves now. That's how you know it's personal! Randy fights up with punches. Whip, reversal and a kitchen sink. Boot to the face by Wade gets two. And back we go to the chinlock. Orton finally reverses with a back suplex, and both are down. They exchange strikes. Yay/boo eventually. Orton wins finally with uppercuts, and gets a kick to the chest and clotheslines off a whip. Scoop slam, and a clothesline sends Wade to the floor. Randy follows, but gets sent back first into the ring post. Wade sends Orton back in, but gets cut off with an Orton kick. Wade grabs the ropes to be prevented from being drag into the center, and goes to the eyes. He misses a clothesline, and an Orton backbreaker gets two. Corner whip, but Orton eats boot. Barrett follows with a clothesline to knock Randy Down. Barrett gets an elbow drop for a long two. Orton is kinda ballsy there, as Cena doesn't have the typical cadence at all, but...ehhh...Wade argues. Wade gets a pumphandle slam for two. Barrett argues again. Wasteland attempt, but Orton fights free, but walks into a bossman slam for two. Barrett argues. Orton comes back with an uppercut, as the fans do the dualing Cena chants. *sigh*

Draping DDT hits. Randy wants the RKO, but Wade bails. Randy follows and clotheslines Barrett on the floor. He send Wade back in, but gets caught with a knee to the face reentering. Wasteland hits. Two count, as Orton gets the ropes. Barrett argues again. This is bad. Wade shoves Cena, and Cena shoves Barrett into the RKO for the pin to retain. And Cena is fired! Na-na-na-na...hey hey!

The match sucked. DUD

Cena throws away his armband, and Cena and Orton take out the rest of Nexus, as well. Well, that storyline is over, at least. Cena presents the title to Orton, and they hug to a decent pop. I don't care. The announcers lay out like this is a huge moment, but it means nothing.

Orton walks away to let Cena have the spotlight for the LAST TIME WE ALWAYS GO THROUGH WITH OUR STIPULATIONS PAL! Cena lays his armbands down to a big chant, and leaves the WWE for the last time!

We'll miss you, John!

Final Thoughts
Well, the first two matches were good, and then this thing hit a wall and never recovered. All 3 of the 'big matches' failed miserably, and this Cena stuff is self indulgant bullshit.
 

Formerly Known

2016 & 2017 Mach Draft Contest Winner
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in the moment i dont think i realized how bad this storyline was. i certainly do now though. all because he couldnt just let them go over at summerslam.
I tapped out after Summerslam, after come back for the attack, so...I had a pretty good idea.

daniel bryan kicking us off. i can get used to this. oh christ its ted dibiases terrible music. so much for bryan's streak of 3.5+ star matches on ppvs.
Never. Doubt. Daniel. Bryan.

im pretty sure the bonus match comes up in between this ppv and the next right? after this show ill search the raws and see, but im pretty sure. (11/22/10. bonus match.)
Indeed. I'm on it, as soon as I'm done with this.

ic title match. a theme song ive never heard before.... holy shit its low ki. why do i not remember him having a ppv match? theyre really going for workrate on this show huh, low ki vs dolph.
[/QUOTE}

Yeah, a PPV title match was his 'prize' for winning NXT season 2. He close the IC title. And lost.

i gotta admit, back in the day i was a major low ki mark. i used to see him a ton in a local promotion here in queens, and he was just a beast in that small pond. in this match... not so much.
He worked really well with a select group of people, and not really anyone else, to be honest. It's kinda sad but true.

how much longer did low ki last with the company before he pouted and complained his way out, like he did everywhere else he ever worked? couldnt be more than another month or two.
Released December 23, 2010. Three more Smackdown matches, and he's gone. Crazy.

man mvp is still over. large large mvp chants. im gonna attribute this to them being in miami. i feel like mvp is the most inexplicably over guy i can ever remember now, after rewatching this timeline.
Yeah, I attributed it to hometown pop, but...yeah. I liked him quite a bit as a heel, and he's over as a face. Kinda a forgotten guy.

how is the big show over? this crowd has moved on to big show chants now.
I have no earthly idea.

619 and an assisted splash from big show finally eliminates jack. i gotta be honest this is one of the better elimination matches in recent memory.
Oof. We're faaaaar apart on this one.

this is very slow. not necessarily a terrible match persay, certainly not overly good, but just very slow.
Holy crap. Maybe I'm just in a bad mood.

cena shoves barrett right into an rko. cena counts the 3 and striker screams out "CENAS FREE".
I have nothing to add to that. Yeah. You liked the bottom part of that show a lot more than I did.
 

Hammer

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i think its better stated "you tolerated the bottom of the card more than me." ill get over your notes and everything in the morning im drunk and watching ufc right now.
 

Formerly Known

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So bonus match time, and I start Raw as I'm waiting for my coffee and WADE IS GETTING OBSCENE HEEL HEAT!

'Last night.' BOOOOOOO! BOOOOO! BOOOT! Holy crap. Put the belt on this guy.

Oh, and Cole announces that Wade/Orton will have a rematch tonight. Huh.

And I fast foward...and CM Punk is joining commentary! He's fantastic at it, too.

And I skip ahead through some KOTR qualifying matches and stuff and straight to the match

WWE Championship: Randy Orton(c) vs. Wade Barrett

Nexus has been banned again, so...yeah, whatever. Wade wants a forfeit, because...uhhh...he attacked Randy earlier. I just don't care. Orton walks to the ring like he's back in RoboOrton mode and it's sold as 'selling'.

Boxing intros are back. Wade gets heat. Orton is over. The bell rings and they circle. Orton fires away with punches, but Wade goes low. And they repeat. Barrett works the left leg in the rope and gets a corner clothesline. Huge Orton chant, and Wade uses the apron on the knee. Cover gets two. Wade kicks away on the hamstring and stays on the knee. Wade drives the knee into the apron and gets another two. Spinning toe hold by Barrett, but Orton kicks him into the turnbuckle. Orton dodges a clothesline and gets his VINTAGE BACKBREAKER, but he hurt himself. Orton sulks to the corner and and Barrett goes back to work on the leg. Wasteland hits. Cover gets...two...as John Cena intereferes for the DQ, and AAs Wade. Cena runs like a bitch from the Nexus. And the Nexus follows. Wait...it's not a DQ, I guess? Wade walks into an RKO for the pin to retain.

The leg work wasn't bad here, and it was more heated than the PPV match, that's for sure. I'll say *1/2, but it was a fun TV match.

But wait...there's more...

Here's the Miz with the briefcase. And Chioda is immediately ready to cash in.

WWE Championship: Randy Orton(c) vs. The Miz (w/Alex Riley)

The bell rings and Miz goes for the leg. Orton punches free. And they do it again. Miz gets kicks the to knee finally, and drops an elbow. Miz wraps Randy's leg around the ringpost twice. Orton counters a third try and sends Miz back into the barricade. Back in, Miz wants a corner clothesline, but Orton takes him down. Skull crushing finale is blocked and Orton gets an uppercut. Draping DDT try, but Miz goes low. He runs into a scoop slam. RKO is being called for, but Miz grabs the skull crushing finale for the pin and the title.

This was a pretty fun cash in. Angry Miz girl is shown in the crowd to set the memes up for life. But wow. I would've been going nuts in the moment, because they put this thing together to show that Miz was going to lose, and then he just won clean.

Awesomeness has begun!

A fun bonus match here again. Good enough stuff.
 
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